Nicknames

I just want to write a quick post. This is a post with no photos, it's a post written to make you use your imagination.
You may think I'm mean, so if you don't want to be offended, maybe you should stop reading now. If you want to laugh, keep reading (and you must use your imagination).As you know, I give people (mostly strangers) nicknames. I have been doing that for the entire last month on the ship and now I want to share my findings with you.
Here they are, in no particular order, some of my favorite people I have affectionately given nicknames to, plus descriptions to help you visualize...

1) ROSE (and Jack)... this adorable lady looked like she walked straight off the Titanic. Not because she dressed like she lived at the turn of the twentieth century, but because she is 97 years old and her husband is 100! Really and truly, this guy is a century old! But that's not the only thing. She pushes him around on his seated walker - all by herself - takes care of him and even stays up past 10 pm! She also made her own clothes that were matching little numbers like pink print pleated skirts with matching sailor hats (and pink leggings and shoes!). Or on formal nights, her sequin cloth homemade hats with fabric draping down the back with a dress to match. She also dances every night in the lounge. She can really move! She is truly an inspiration, all 88, or so, pounds of her!
2) PETER GRIFFIN... he actually sits at my table and is TRULY very intelligent. But one of the first nights of the cruise, I look across the table, and a voice that sounded like Lois Griffin says - really loud in my ear - 'PETAH GRIFFIN'. It was all I could do to not crack up then and there! I seriously couldn't even look to his side of the table. A couple of days later I was talking to Jeff Trachta (this was a couple of days after his show, when he did an impersonation of Stewie) and I said, are you a fan of Family Guy? He replies by doing Stewie's voice, to confirm the obvious fact, and I say back - 'did you see Peter on the ship?'. He said he hadn't, so I said, look slowly over your shoulder at the guy in the blue shirt. It was priceless as he turned around and bit into his fist to keep from laughing!!! Priceless
3) ELFIN' MAGIC... there is the cutest, tiniest little man. He totally looks like a Keebler elf-all 3 ft 6 inches of him!
4) GRIM REAPER & RIGOR MORTUS... these two are newlyweds-90something newlyweds! He has dark sunken eyes-pretty scary. she has bright red dyed hair, but at the shows (where they usually sit right on the front row) she inevitably falls asleep and her head leans way back, mouth open, her face totally frozen in that death-looking posture. HILARIOUS
I will give you more nicknames later.
TINY KONA'S TRUISM of the Day... Allison, you are SOOOOOO bad!